Sweet Smooshy

Lately, your daddy has been able to get you to fall asleep in his arms deeply enough that he can lay you down in your crib to nap.  And if gives us usually only a half hour, but a half hour that we can use to spend together or clean up with all 4 hands (rather than 1 of us being preoccupied with you and your silliness). 

But the other night he did it at bed time.  He turned on the monitor and came upstairs and we could hear you sleeping away.  I had a hard time getting to sleep that night.  And when a little over an hour and a half later you awoke, I was more than ready for cuddles.  I don't think either of us are really ready to sleep without the other.

The same thing happened tonight, only it was before I was going to bed.  You were asleep in your crib and your daddy and I got to watch t.v. all by ourselves.  But the second I heard you crying, I rushed down and could see you outlined, standing in your crib, crying.  I scooped you up and smooched on you and brought you upstairs, where upon arrival you started to nurse, only to immediately drift back to sleep.

It won't always be like this.  These moments will go so quickly and no amount of me wanting to slow time down seems to be doing so.  I wish that to stop your tears at any point in your life it was as easy as swooping you up and loving on you.  But since that's not possible.  Since someday down the road your tears will simply have to be cried, and the hurts felt, I'll take the moments in. 

I love you.
Mama

Delight

You, my daughter, delight in life.  Everything causes you to pause and then your eyes twinkle, your nose twitches as it scrunches up and you giggle as if the beauty of life is such a delightful surprise.  You cause me to see beauty in the mundane.

And it's these moments where I see the mixture of your daddy and me.  Your face is so like mine, from it's roundness to the pointy chin.  I used to hate my chin, but seeing it on you I'm starting to learn to love it.  And then your eyes are large and rounder like mine, but the muscle structure is like your daddy's and they crinkle as you smile, closing to smaller slits.  The dimples appear and it's a common remark to hear that you are so like a mischievous elf.

I whisper in your ear that I hope you never lose this wonder, this fascination with and love of life.  And then you reach out your hand to my face and laugh, as if the concept is hilarious.

My how I love you, ma petite.