I asked G the date today and when he said the 25th, I smirked at him. He stared, wondering why I seemed so smug. I then informed him that we had less than 2 months now until her guess date. He just stared at me, with a look of "holy cow" upon his face.
The stroller, carseat and swing are in boxes in our kitchen. The crib arrives in about a week (it wasn't supposed to arrive for another month or three). There is a pack n play in our office, along with the diaper bag and the cloth diapers I've stocked up on. Baby clothes are all throughout the house as we round up what's new and what we've been collecting for years. And we have both a boppy and a my brest friend in our living room.
It's becoming quite clear that she'll be here in no time. Children's books are strewn about as G has been reading to her often. I see my midwife every 2 weeks now, and am getting ready to schedule one last sonogram to check my placenta and make sure a normal delivery is going to work. And we took classes on cloth diapering and baby wearing today.
It's both scary and exciting. I sat next to a woman with a 5 week old little girl today and said to G, "Little Miss will be that age around Christmas." She was so cute and tiny and G's pretty sure he's going to break our daughter because "she'll be so little." But then I saw him put on a ring sling and a mei tai and he seemed so natural.
We're still in awe that this is our life. This thing we never thought would be ours. This experience we weren't even sure we wanted any time soon. And yet he likes to wrap up around me in the mornings while I doze and feel her kick against him. He likes to whisper plans for the future to her. We sat eating grilled cheese with apple slices and glasses of milk tonight and he said, "Just wait til you're old enough for solid foods." We finished it off with chocolate pudding and he said, "You won't understand how lucky you are for a while to have a mama who cooks like this."
I just want time to slow. For her childhood to drag on. For all the little giggly moments to never cease. And yet I want her here, to hold. To teach how to bake cookies and build forts and dance on her daddy's toes. Not too slow, but not too fast either.